Spit back facts in the form of unremitting tactless acts
I'm packed with laxatives, full of shit but committed to living
The happiest accidents, I get a pass for it
Since my dad was in advertising I've been a wise guy given to whining
Now I'm shining, or at least polishing an untruth
I might be a goofy kid on the stoop,
Never the teammate you'd honestly choose
But I'm a serious man on the stage
Acting the part, if not acting my age
Yeah there's always something to write
But never enough to say

I wrote a lot of songs last summer, I should have known
That I'd be pacing, lamely pasted to my home
Chaste and irritated waiting by the phone
Now it's awful long, what a bummer to move so slow
It almost hurts to discover that maybe I don't mind being alone

I've been called a narcissist: if any exist,
Take a look at all these photos that make up my thicker skin
Take a look at how I fit in, take a look at the life that I live
And the shit that you give, life's hard enough as people with nothing to give, so give in
I set my stakes in shallow waters, so much water we have lost
Modern waters make 'em seem taller,
Don't bother me, please, about our modern disease,
I won't pretend to be deep, piss in the digital breeze

I wrote a lot of songs last summer, I should have known
That I'd be pacing, lamely pasted to my home
Chaste and irritated waiting by the phone
Now it's awful long, what a bummer to move so slow
It almost hurts to discover that maybe I don't mind being alone

So much of this act
Is centered on my back
Stacks on top of stacks of me
So much of this act is happiness, in fact, all I've ever lacked was peace
But now that I'm alone

I wrote a lot of songs last summer, I should have known
That I'd be pacing, lamely pasted to my home
Chaste and irritated waiting by the phone
Now it's awful long, what a bummer to move so slow
It almost hurts to discover that maybe I don't mind being alone